Being True to Yourself

Being in the mood for poetry, I would like to share a poem that touched my heart. The first time I heard it, read by my teacher, lying in shavasana after a long practice, being very present and open, I cried...!

The Invitation
By Oriah Mountain Dreamer

It doesn’t interest me what you do for a living.
I want to know what you ache for
and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart’s longing.

It doesn’t interest me how old you are.
I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love
for your dream
for the adventure of being alive.

It doesn’t interest me what planets are squaring your moon...
I want to know if you have touched the centre of your own sorrow
if you have been opened by life’s betrayals
or have become shrivelled and closed
from fear of further pain.

I want to know if you can sit with pain
mine or your own
without moving to hide it
or fade it or fix it.

I want to know if you can be with joy
mine or your own
if you can dance with wildness
and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes
without cautioning us
to be careful
to be realistic
to remember the limitations of being human.

It doesn’t interest me if the story you are telling me is true.
I want to know if you can disappoint another
to be true to yourself.
If you can bear the accusation of betrayal
and not betray your own soul.
If you can be faithless
and therefore trustworthy.

I want to know if you can see Beauty
even when it is not prettyevery day.
And if you can source your own life
from its presence.

I want to know if you can live with failure
yours and mine
and still stand at the edge of the lake
and shout to the silver of the full moon,
“Yes.”

It doesn’t interest me
to know where you live or how much money you have.
I want to know if you can get up
after the night of grief and despair
weary and bruised to the bone
and do what needs to be done
to feed the children.

It doesn’t interest me who you know
or how you came to be here.
I want to know if you will stand
in the centre of the fire
with me
and not shrink back.

It doesn’t interest me where or what or with whom
you have studied.
I want to know what sustains you
from the inside
when all else falls away.

I want to know if you can be alone
with yourself
and if you truly like the company you keep
in the empty moments.

On Changing Negative Habits

AUTOBIOGRAPHY IN FIVE SHORT CHAPTERS
From There's a Hole in My Sidewalk By Portia Nelson

I I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost ...
I am helpless.
It isn't my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don't see it.
I fall in again.
I can't believe I am in the same place.
But, it isn't my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in.
It's a habit.
My eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It is my fault.
I get out immediately.

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.

I walk down another street.

Healthy Snacks

Bill, a teacher at my shala, makes these wonderfull balls made of dried fruit and nuts, which are wonderful to eat as a snack after practice. I´ve experimented a bit, and I now make them now and again to bring as a snack. Many friends are asking for the recipe, so I thought it a good idea to write it here on the blog. I was thinking of naming them "Bills Balls", but hmm, no, I think not! If I remenber right, he calls them "Energy Balls". He told us they are made in India when a woman who is breast feeding needs to produce more milk. So they are quite nutricious.

ENERGY BALLS (ANANDA ROLLS)
Dried figs, dried unsulphured apricots, dried raisins, linseeds, sunflower seeds, almonds and dried coconut

Mix everything in a food processor. I put in about the same amount of everything. All ingredients should be dry. No soaking. Take a teaspoon of the mixture in your hand and press it together and then roll into a ball. If necessary, if it is too dry and it gets hard to roll them, you can add a few drops of cold pressed sesame oil.
Voilá!

There is another recipe I would like to share. When I was in Houtskär, Finland, on a retreat with Lino Miele and Petri Räisänen, they made a very delicious porridge.

FRESH PORRIDGE
1 dl sunflower seeds, 3/4 dl linseeds (freshly crushed), 0,5 dl sesame seeds (freshly crushed), 1/4 dl rosehip powder (nypon), 1 dl dried plums, 1 dl dried apricots
Soak in water overnight.
In the morning, add some more water if needed, add one banana and mix together. Eat as it is together with oat milk, or use as a topping on your regular porridge. It´s quite sweet.

Formula of the Djungle Physician

John Scott is one of the best teachers I´ve encountered. I´ve come to realize that the workshops that only have Mysore practice are not so fulfilling. Maybe you get a few nice adjustments and inspiration, but you haven´t learned so much. But John had a four day workshop with lots of theory and practice. Talking a lot about the philosophy, and less about asana technique. He was very good at giving images of theoretical ideas. He gave a picture of how prana (inner wind) is like the ocean. It is stillness, emptyness. The breath is the outer wind, creating waves on the ocean. The waves are the form (asana). So we practiced together in silence, syncronised, just listening to the breath, and it really felt like we were waves on the ocean! Just energy moving.

He gave us some formulas:

FORMULA OF THE DJUNGLE PHYSICIAN
1. SPINE (straighten spine- gives the foundation)
2. RELAX (creates space)
3. BREATH (moves prana)
4. COUNTING (meditiation- stills the mind)

ANOTHER FORMULA
1. Faith in the method
2. Faith in the teacher
3. Faith in the self
4. Copy teacher (this is very asian- something I recognize from my taiji practice, but it requires a good teacher. Westerners are taught to have a sceptical mind, which is good in certain ways, but I think it can sometimes be in the way for learning new ideas. I´ve read somewhere that you should have an open mind, but a sceptical veiw.)

Preparations

Seven weeks to go, and I´m starting to think about what to bring. I read in one of the Mysore blogs that you should bring as little as possible, since you can buy everything there. I´ve never been a small packer...I always want to be prepared for evey situation! Control freak I guess. But I am going to do my best this time. I think I am going to have lunch with my friend Jesus soon. He was in Mysore in March I think it was. I´m sure he can give me some advice.

Here are some of the things I´m thinking about wether to bring or not:

• bed sheets
• towels (that I don´t need to bring with me home)
• cushion (I already bought one, it´s going to take up half my suitcase, but I´m going to need to sleep well down there!)
• yoga mat, both the rubber one and the cotton one, or just the rubber one

As you see, these things can take up pretty much of my suitcase, so if you want to add a comment and give me some advice, feel free!

Setting up the blog

Actually, I had not thought about having a travel blog, but a friend of mine asked me if I was going to have one, and it seemed like a nice idea. So, here it is. I hope that I will be diligent enough to write frequently, and perhaps also show some pictures. I´m writing in English, partly because there will be no å, ä, ö in India, partly because I wish this blog to be accessible to other yogis thinking about going to Mysore and for my friends who don´t speak Swedish.

I`ve been reading some blogs from Mysore, and it has helped me get a picture of what to expect. Well, I´m trying to have very few expectations (they usually make you disppointed, but are very difficult to avoid! (aparigraha-non attachment), but at the same time i think getting a picture of what it might be like can take away some of the fears you have about traveling to an exotic country far away.....